Blue Peter
“From our Nudge! Nudge! Wink! Wink! department”

Amongst the usual wheelbarrow loads of spam I’ve been getting in my intray over the past week or three, there’s been several dozen with a subject line consisting of some variation on the theme “My boyfriends’ <insert slang name for willy> is so big… yadda… yadda…”. I don’t actually know what the rest of the line is, as it gets cut off by the edge of my email app window and - needless to say - I just delete spam without looking at it, but one thing I did find mildly amusing: where the *<slang name for willy> *appears in the subject line, I’ve seen all the usual suspects used; ‘Penis’, ‘Cock’, ‘Wang’, ‘Pecker’, and so on. However I’ve also noticed quite a few emails proclaiming *“My boyfriend’s peter is so big….”* etc.

PETER???!!! –Who in the name of anal fuck calls their willy [or their boyfriend’s willy for that matter] a fucking ‘peter’?!

MAN: Darling?

WOMAN: What is it?

MAN [Sexily]: I want you to do something for me…

WOMAN [Also sexily]: Anything! - What is it?

MAN: Will you suck my peter?

[Short pause]

WOMAN: Oh… All right then. But he can’t stay for dinner. We’ve got nothing in!

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