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Out Of The Pens Of Babes And Sucklings
10 Jun 2015
Portrait of the author as an old man The astute reader may remember the above illustration from such posts of mine as “Arse-Sum!”. It was done my my wee niece when I was up visiting the in-laws over Christmas and is a portrait of your humble author. What many art critics don’t realise is that the piece is actually one half of a diptych –both halves of which I am lucky enough to have in my private collection.... [ Read More ]
Remove Google Search Bar From Android Lollipop
31 May 2015
The Omnipresent Google Search Bar Just a quick ‘Howto’ for you today, dear readers. Having recently upgraded my Galaxy Tab from Android KitKat to Lollipop I couldn’t for the life of me find a way to turn off the omnipresent Google Search Bar on my homescreen [I’m sure on the ROM I was runnning previously, there was just a simple tickbox in settings somewhere to get rid of it]. So, as you do, I searched the intarwebs for enlightenment, only to find [as you also always do] myself ploughing through a morass of conflicting and often completely wrong advice.... [ Read More ]
Anti-Electioneering
08 May 2015
Apropos of nothing much really. Just a couple of cartoons I scribbled yesterday and stuck on my Twatter feed throughout the day –to nail my apathetic colours to the “None of the Above” mast.... [ Read More ]
Javascript Overlays Are The Pop-Ups 'De Nous Jours'
04 May 2015
Just a leetle Overlay. Eet is verra theen! [Image Credit: Rex Features] Remember the bad old days of the Intarwebs, when we used to all get annoyed about websites that shoved pop-up windows in our faces? I think, somewhere in the ancient bowels of this blog, I once compared such goings on to; a waiter, unannounced, shoving the wine menu between your fork and the plate you were about to eat from and demanding you give it your attention… “RIGHT NOW!!!”.... [ Read More ]
Apple Security Update Broke SSL
03 May 2015
DISCLAIMER: I am by no stretch of the imagination a “Security Expert”. So please bear in mind that following any advice I give on the subject is akin to placing your todger in the hands of Sweeney Todd and asking for ‘Just a pubic trim, please…’ DISCLAIMER2: In explaining this lot, I’m over-simplifying and using generic terms a lot. That’s partly because I don’t know what the feck I’m talking about.... [ Read More ]
Meet Interlingua!
30 Mar 2015
Image credit: drbrd.com The other day, while wandering aimlessly down the dusty by-roads of the internet, I found myself reading an article on Esperanto. For those of you who haven’t heard of it, Esperanto is a “constructed language” which means it has been deliberately created rather than, as with other languages, having evolved naturally from our Neanderthal gruntings and nether-scratchings. The rationale behind constructed languages is twofold: Firstly: Being ‘constructed’ they can be designed with a completely regular grammar structure, thus making them easy to learn.... [ Read More ]
Arse Sum!
23 Mar 2015
I’ve mentioned before my long-standing abhorrence of the use of the non-word ‘Solutions’ in the corporate world and the red mist still descends, every time I see it. Of late however it has been replaced in my odium by an even more irritating word: “Awesome”. Like most of the world’s major irritations, the use of the word ‘awesome’ as the ‘no-brain-required’ default adjective to describe anything which causes the slightest degree of pleasure whatsoever, started with the ‘Merkins.... [ Read More ]
In Praise Of Skeuomorphism
23 Mar 2015
One of the big changes that was trumpeted across the geek press, when Apple announced OSX Yosemite was Apple’s decision to do away with any hint of ‘Skeuomorphism’ in the look of the OS. Flattely will get you nowhere! In a software setting, skeuomorphism means designing a software interface so it looks like a real world object. So, for example, a diary application might present an interface which looks like a leather bound ledger, or a calendar app might animate the turning pages of a calendar as you flip through its screens.... [ Read More ]
Hoots, Mon. Roots, Mon!
17 Mar 2015
Over the weekend, as is my occasional wont, I did a bit of genealogical research [my mammy is the main ‘Ancestor Hunter’ in the family, but I like to stick my oar in occasionally]. Anyway, I stumbled upon a surprising new fact, which has completely changed what I’d always assumed to be my genetic inheritence. Up until the weekend, I’d thought my lineage went thus: Finest pedigree purebred mongrel But I’ve just discovered that my granny on my dad’s side wasn’t descended from a long line of Scots after all.... [ Read More ]
Lá 'Le Phadaí Shona Daoibh
17 Mar 2015
Mar is gnath liom. Is é inniú an lá aonar sa bhliain nuair atá iarracht orm ‘post’ a scríobhann as gaeilge. Mar is gnath liom fréisín, is níos mó “briste” na “cliste” é. Ach… “Lá ‘le Phaidí Shona le Mo Léitheoirí go Leir” ..in aon chuma! Sea. Tá seo an pictiúr céanna le na bliana seo caite… agus an bhliain roimhe sin… agus an bhliain roimhe sinse… Ach déireann siad go ‘Athchúrsáil Maith don Chomhshaol’!... [ Read More ]
Happy Pi On Face Day!
14 Mar 2015
On my over-breakfast trawling of the intarwebs this morning, I am greeted almost universally with the news that today is “Happy Pi Day”, owing to the propitious configuration of the numbers in the date spelling out the first six digits of that hallowed number. Picture credit: Matt Groening [Obviously!] I must say, I’m feeling somewhat irked by this news and would like to demand a belated apology from my old Maths teacher Mr.... [ Read More ]
An Exercise In Ultimate Geekiness
04 Mar 2015
The Challenge As proofs-of-concept go, this has got to be worth several zillion Geek Points. I set myself the challenge to update this blog, working entirely on an Android tablet. Might not sound like much of a challenge on the face of it, until you remember that this blog is built using the Static Site Generator Hugo and kept updated and syncronised using Git [neither of which run natively on Android] Anyway, wish me luck, Skip.... [ Read More ]
N-O-O-O-O!!!!
27 Feb 2015
I thought I couldn’t get more gutted than when Scotty died… and now this! [Oh well. I know what I’m going to be watching for the rest of the night!]…... [ Read More ]
Fixing Android Insufficient Storage Error
27 Feb 2015
This “fix-it” relates specifically to certain rooted Samsung devices [in my case a Galaxy Tab 2 10,1] which under a certain set of circumstances [which I’ll outline shortly] will leave you head-butting walls in sheer frustration, throwing up an ‘Insufficient Storage Available’ error whenever you try to install any app –this in spite of you having plenty of free space available, both internally [Phone/Tablet]and externally [SD Card]. The peculiar set of circumstances in question being any combo or all of: You have at some stage tried an App which promised to move your apps to your SD Cards but then failed miserably to be able to do so.... [ Read More ]
Brothword 0001
23 Feb 2015
It gives me insurmountable pleasure to present for the delight and delectation of my vast hordes of eager readers, the first in what may very well [or may very well not] be a regular fixture on this ‘ere website. Namely the inaugural ‘Brothword’. I’ll admit the layout of the grid could be better but, since it’s my first crack at compiling a crossword, I don’t think it’s too shabby. Answers same time next week!... [ Read More ]
Bringing A Cintiq Back From The Dead
18 Feb 2015
Many, many moons ago I rescued an old Wacom Cintiq graphics tablet from the skip at the college where I worked at the time. It was being chucked out, not because it was actually broken, but because Wacom, in their infinite wisdom had built that particular model [Cintiq 15X] with a proprietory DIN style connection instead of a standard USB socket. The tablet came with an equally proprietory USB-to–DIN cable which, at some point during the intervening years had got lost or broken.... [ Read More ]
Yandex As An Alternative To Google?
17 Feb 2015
A wee while back, when the latest Prism / NSA spying scandals and similar underhand shenanigans were filling the headlines, I started looking around for non-US alternatives to the various internet services I use. Not because I’m “up to no good” –as the moronic “If you’re not doing anything wrong, you’ve nothing to hide…” mantra chanters, would probably infer– but just as a point of principle. One of the alternatives I looked at was using Yandex as an alternative to Google for [amongst other things] handling email on the various domain names I own.... [ Read More ]
Nous Sommes Charlie
09 Jan 2015
"Is God willing to prevent Evil, but not able? Then He is not omnipotent. Is He able but not willing? Then He is malevolent. Is He both able and willing? Then whence cometh Evil? Is He neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?" [Epicurus. 341-270BC]... [ Read More ]
Nostradamus Corner 2015
01 Jan 2015
Well, my lovelies. Here we are again. I’ve been gazing in wonderment at my ball all morning, I’ve swirled the tea leaves round like a feckin’ Catherine Wheel and the chicken entrails are steaming away nicely. It’s time to visit that Twilight Zone-esque corner of space and time known as “Nostradamus Corner”, wherein I veritably sweep aside the curtain of the present and peer myopically into the future, to see what 2015 has in store for us all: Philae will sadly fail to wake from his winter nap as comet 67/P approaches nearer the sun.... [ Read More ]
Nostradamus Corner 2014 The Post-Mortem
31 Dec 2014
Hello there, dear readers tumbleweed! –and welcome to what has now become a bit of a tradition round my parts; namely my making a set of hopeless predictions for the year ahead, at the turn of the year. I’ll be making my risible predictions for next year tomorrow, but for now let’s see how I got on last year. Those of you out there of a gambling bent will soon realise that a good strategy to maximise your profitibility for the forthcoming solar soujourn is to note down my fuck-arsed visions of the future and then bet heavily on whatever the opposite of them all is.... [ Read More ]